Move over, horse racing—there’s a new thoroughbred in town. The winner of the world’s first-ever sperm race officially gets crowned, blending genetics, fertility clinics, and a dash of reality TV spectacle. It’s the only sporting event where the swimmers actually matter.

Amid cheers, the winner of World’s First Sperm Race took home not just a gleaming, gold-plated sperm trophy but also eternal bragging rights, cementing this quirky event’s place in history. The world’s first sperm race proves sometimes, science really does go for gold.