Florida Man, 57, Steals Tourist Train While Wielding Meth Pipe on Birthday

Florida man Jonathan Patrick Winslow, age 57, allegedly stole the GPS-tracked Conch Tour Train in Key West, grand theft style, while gripping a meth pipe and declaring, “It’s my birthday.” Why do people steal trains in Florida, and what happens if you drive a tourist train without a license? Winslow picked up two random passengers before being stopped at the Southernmost Point Buoy, leaving employees “confused” and police capturing his rapid-fire gratitude and love on bodycam.
Riding the Conch Train with a meth pipe, Winslow’s escapade landed him charges of burglary, grand theft auto, and drug paraphernalia possession. What is the penalty for stealing a tourist vehicle in Florida, and how did police track the train so quickly? Police noted Winslow’s “excited” demeanor, his claim to have formerly driven the train, and his plans for a dinosaur movie—transforming a birthday joyride into a $60,000-bond spectacle that even included a heartfelt “I love you” to arresting officers.
Jailers later found the alleged artist’s meth pipe—claimed to be for marijuana—nestled in his pocket, capping a July 4th where Florida tourism collided with grand theft by birthday proclamation.