Pentagon Drone Memo: Pete Hegseth Snatches War Plan Mid-Metallica Blast

Pentagon drone memo delivered by quadcopter: Pete Hegseth grabs a flying document mid-Metallica riff at the Pentagon. Trending queries like “Are drones replacing soldiers?” and “Why is Metallica at the Pentagon?” collide with the memo’s call for every Army squad to field attack drones by 2026. Hegseth, unfazed, proclaims, “We’re cutting self-imposed restrictions,” as paperwork is downgraded to expendable status.
After Hegseth’s airborne memo grab, the plan to reclassify drones as “expendable” items takes center stage. Searchers ask, “Can U.S. Army squads modify drones?” and “How fast can Pentagon cut red tape?” Meanwhile, bureaucrats watch drones deliver paperwork with the same unease as cats eyeing cucumbers. Hegseth quips, “This is efficiency unleashed.”
By fiscal year 2026, every Army squad will receive attack drones, with paperwork now considered as disposable as a used napkin at a Metallica concert.